My Edward
by 8thweasleykid
Summary: Bella choses to ignore Edwards...differences...and he choses to let her. A brief AU one shot of what their realtionship could have been like.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**A little Twilight AU that popped into my head. I hope you enjoy it.**

I met Edward my junior year of high school and my first impression of him was, well not at all flattering. As soon as I sat beside him in Biology II he gave me this completely furious look and then he scooted as far to the opposite end of the table as possible, then covering his mouth with his hand, looked quite like he was about to vomit. The first question that crossed my mind was, did I smell? I had taken a shower, washed my hair. No, I decided whatever was making him uncomfortably couldn't possibly be me. So I ignored his odd behavior for the rest of class.

It was a few days later, after a short absence from school, he finally introduced himself. He didn't apologize or explain his behavior, but I figured, hey we all have bad days, right. Over the next few weeks, as we gradually got to know each other better, for some reason had a difficult time deciding if he wanted to be my friend, and in truth I was getting rather tired of his bi-polar attitude toward me, but then he had to go and save my life.

Tyler had skidded his van on a patch of ice, he was coming right at me, I didn't even have time to react and the suddenly, Edward was there, he knocked me out of the way and…somehow stopped the van…with his bare hand. He told me later he had an adrenalin rush, I pretended to believe him, but deep down I had my doubts. It was after that point that we started hanging out on a regular basis, and as we did I began to notice things about him that weren't, well normal.

His body temperature was constantly at like below zero, his eyes change color from black to gold. Gold, who has gold eyes that's not an owl. But his entire family did, even though they aren't supposed to be biologically related. I never saw him eat or drink anything, and sometimes his vocabulary…no one used words the way he did anymore. But since I enjoyed having him in my life, I pretended not to notice, and of course he never brought it up.

It was approaching the end of the year and Edward and I were sitting in the bed of my trunk during lunch time talking. We actually had a lot in common. We read the same types of books, liked the same movies, held the same interests. At the moment however the current topic was the upcoming prom.

"Are you planning on attending?" He asked, his eyes drifted to the copy of Weathering Height which rested in his lap.

"I wasn't planning on it. I don't dance, but I already told you that, didn't I."

"Yes, you did". With a long deep breath he slowly raised his head and as he looked at me he softly placed his cool hand atop of mine.

"I was hoping, if you didn't already have plans, that you would consent to allow me to accompany you. Despite you lack of coordination." He gave me a crooked smile as he gently rubbed his thumb over the top of my hand.

I will admit that at that point, despite only seeing Edward as a friend, I was quite attracted to him. Apart from his adopted father he was the most handsome man I had ever met. He had never made any indication that he felt anything romantic for me before that point, and in truth I was starting to wonder if the rumors that he was gay were true. Obviously they weren't.

"Um, sure. I suppose we could go. As long as you don't make me do any actual dancing while were there."

"I wouldn't dream of it." He then brought my hand to his lips and kissed it softly.

By the time the school year ended we were an official couple.

I spent the majority of my summer, that was when I wasn't working, at the Cullens. Alice and I quickly became great fiends, despite the fact that we were opposites in almost every sense of the term, we understood each other remarkably well and found each other easy to talk to. His whole family was actually petty great, except for Rosalie, who for some unknown reason simply didn't like me. Not that I really cared, I simply did as Edward suggested and ignored her.

Edward had always been very…careful when it came the physical aspect of our relationship. It was almost like he was afraid he was going to hurt me. We kissed, and touched a little, but he never seemed to want to go past that. That was, until the evening of my eighteenth birthday.

We were in his room, on his bed, and I had every intention of taking full advantage of the king size mattress. His family was gone on a camping trip for the weekend, so it was just me and him, in his big house all alone, on my birthday. Yea! I was currently straddling his lap, my hands around his neck, his on my waist as I all too willingly shoved my tongue down his throat.

I moaned as his cool lips moved to my neck sending kisses all the way down to my collarbone, Lord that boy could kiss; with a low groan that almost sounded like a growl deep in the back of his throat, he suddenly and unexpectedly did something he never had before. I had on a low cut tank top which he quickly began to take full advantage of, pressing his lips to the swell of my exposed breast. "Oh god, Edward."

He gave another deep groan and suddenly I felt his body reacting. "Edward." I took advantage and began to grind myself against his hardened appendage.

"Bella." His voice was so deep I almost didn't recognize it. And then before I even realized it I was on my back, his strong, hard body hovering over me. I watched as his eyes, which had suddenly turned coal black, focused not on my face, or even my chest, but my neck.

"Edward." My voice was shaky and suddenly I felt extremely nervous, though I wasn't exactly sure why.

He blinked before moving his eyes to mine.

"I think maybe we should stop."

With a simple nod, he climbed of his bed, allowing me to do the same.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom, I'll be back in a bit."

Again he just nodded.

I gave him some alone time, fifteen minutes or so, I figured if he needed to wank off or whatever that would give him plenty of time. When I came back, he was gone. A note rested on his pillow, saying he was sorry but that he needed to get some air. He suggested I go home, so I did.

The following morning, I woke to the sound of the door bell. He smiled, his now golden eyes shining brightly. He offered to accompany me for a walk in the woods so we could talk, I gladly accepted. I really needed to know what was going on with him.

"I apologize…if I frightened you yesterday." He couldn't even look at me when he spoke the words. "I became rather excited with our activity and got carried away."

I couldn't help but laugh. He was always so formal. "It's okay to get carried away, Edward, we are dating."

"Yes, but…I almost went to a level that would have been…disastrous."

There was something he wasn't telling me, but I always thought that when I was with him. As if he had some horrible secret he couldn't share.

"Are you talking about sex?" I thought he might be, but in truth I wasn't quite sure. The way he looked at me the night before, his dark eyes filled with lust I could tell he wanted me, but there was something else lingering in them as well. Something I couldn't explain or understand.

"Partly." He admitted with a soft chuckle.

"I'd like to, you know." I admitted shyly. "I know we've only been dating a few months, but maybe, down the line we could."

Suddenly he stopped walking, he took me in his arms and I placed a soft kiss on my nose. "Can I ask you a personal question?"

"Sure."

"Are you…a virgin."

I couldn't help it I laughed. I thought he already knew the answer to that. "Yes, are you?"

He shook his head. "No. My ex-girlfriend in Alaska".

The topic of past boyfriends had come up before. I had, had one, a boy in Phoenix my freshman year of high school. He moved half way through the year and slowly our long distance relationship sizzled out. We had never done anything more than hug, hold hands and kiss. Edward had dated a girl, who apparently he had a crush on him for a while and he agreed to give it a shot, but it didn't work out.

"Oh, so what you're afraid of comparing her with me?"

He laughed and shook his head. "Not at all. My feelings for you are vastly different then they are for Tanya."

"Really?" I quirked an eyebrow. "How so?"

He responded by kissing me deeply. "You mean so much more to me then she ever could."

It wasn't a confession of love, but it was good enough for me.

The months went on, school went on, life went on. We continued our life together, and it was wonderful, but in the back of my head, I always had this dreadful feeling that the end of the school year meant the end of our relationship. The thought of losing Edward hurt me deeply, but it was bearable because for some reason I had this feeling that his future and mine were on vastly different planes, plane that could never fully come together.

It was late one June evening, the night of our graduation, I had grudgingly gone to Alice's party but Edward and I snuck out a couple of hours into it. He drove me back to my house, but instead of going inside, we went and lay out under the stars in the bed of my truck. It was a beautifully clear night, perfect for star gazing.

"I've decided to accept the offer to go to Cambridge." He said out of the blue interrupting the silence.

"I thought you would. I mean you'd have to be a complete idiot to pass up a chance to go to an Ivy League school."

He gave a small chuckle as he wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer. "Indeed it would." And then he sighed, long and deep and I knew what was coming. "I don't think we will be able to…continue what we have with me at school in England and you in Florida."

I loosened myself from his arms and turned on my side to face him. "I know. I was…thinking the same thing."

He ran his cool fingers down my cheek and across my lips. "I didn't want it to end like this. I…I wish things were different."

"I know, I do too. But hey, we can still be friends, right. We can e-mail and call each other."

He nodded and kissed the top of my head. "I'd very much like that."

"Can I ask one thing of you, before we…go our separate ways?"

He nodded.

"Make love to me."

For a minute he just looked at me, his golden eyes filled with a mixture of so many emotions I couldn't tell them apart.

Then he nodded. "Go inside and bring out as many blankets as you can."

I had no idea what he was up to, but knowing Edward, it would be special. So I headed inside, careful not to wake Charlie, I headed upstairs to the linen closet and pulled out every single blanket, comforter and pillow in there. When I headed back outside I found Edward standing by my truck.

"Put them in the back. I'm going to put the trunk in neutral and push it down the street so it won't wake Charlie when we start it." Giggling I nodded.

Placing the blankets into the back, I jumped into the bed as well.

Edward carefully pushed the truck out of the drive way and down to the very end of the street. I quickly got into the passenger and he into the drivers. He then started the engine which roared to life with a bang.

"Where are we going?" I asked excitedly.

"You know that meadow I took you to for our third date."

"Yes, it was beautiful."

"That's where I'm going to make love to you, Bella." He then reached over taking my hand in his.

I felt completely excited but also incredibly nervous. I was about to lose my virginity to my soon-to-be ex-boyfriend. It felt both incredibly right and very wrong all at the same time.

We drove as far as the trunk could go until the woods became too thick with trees, and then began to hike. Edward somehow managed to carry the blanks and me at the same time for over five miles, up steep and rocky hills. The man could do anything!

When we reached the beautiful meadow surrounded by blue and purple flowers, my gorgeous boyfriend gently placed me on the ground then quickly going about setting down blankets into a make-shift bed.

Reclining on the blankets, he reached out for me, I quickly joined him. "Oh, Bella." He buried his face into my hair taking in the scent of my vanilla shampoo before sliding it down to the crook of my neck. "This night will be with me for eternity." Then he began to kiss me.

I woke to the sight of a stream of sunlight drifting across my bare stomach. It was just after dawn, the sun peaking through the mild cloud cover. With a stretch I turned to my side, he was still there, smiling sweetly, and just as naked as I was.

"Good morning." He said leaning over kissing my lips.

"Indeed it is."

"I'm afraid I left you with some…bruising." He frowned slightly as he softly ran a finger down my right forearm, which was in fact showing a few blue and purple marks.

"It's alright, Edward. It's not like I've never had one before."

He shook his head slightly. "I tried to be gentle." He said softly, his eyes then drifting down to my thighs where there were several more bruises. "I am truly sorry."

"Edward." Placing my hand on his cheeks his moved his eyes back to mine. "Don't be. It was the most wonderful, amazing moment of my life, and I will never forget it."

He gave a small smile, and then softly kissed me. "I love you."

The words took me by surprise. Not because I didn't think he meant them, but simply because he admitted to it. In a week's time I would be moving to Florida and in truth I didn't know if I would actually ever see him again. But maybe that was exactly why he chose to say them at that moment, because he didn't know if he ever have a chance after this.

And I thought if he could confess his heart, regardless of our uncertain futures, I could as well.

"I love you too."

We made love one final time before he took me home.

Seven days later I found myself standing in my bedroom doorway, giving one last look at the room I had lived in for the past year in a half. I had originally had serious misgivings about coming to Forks but in the end it had been the best experience of my life, at least up to that point. I had been able to spend some quality time with my dad, made some new friends, even learned to surf (sort of), but best of all, I met my Edward. To me he would always be my Edward.

"Bella, you have guests." Charlie's voice pulled me from my thoughts. Grabbing my last bag I headed downstairs.

I had expected Jacob and Billy, they had promised to come say good bye, but it wasn't my way too tall for being sixteen year old friend, or is father, but the man I loved and my best friend.

"Hi, Bella." Alice quickly pulled me into a hug. "I wanted to come by and say hi just once more before you left. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course no, I'm glad you came."

Alice quickly released me, allowing my…well, ex-boyfriend access to me.

"One last hug." He said opening his arms, I quickly slid into them.

"I hope not." I whispered.

"I had to see you at least one more time."

"I'm glad you did."

"We have present for you." Alice chirped in.

"A present?"

She motioned to Edward who then reached into his pocket and pull out…keys?

"Consider in an early nineteenth birthday present." He then placed then into my palm. Looking down there were two keys linked to a silver keychain with the word VOLVO engraved into them.

"You didn't?"

"I won't be needing it at Cambridge, and I didn't feel right having it just sit in the garage for four years unused". My jaw had drooped practically to my toes at this point. "I've had it cleaned and detailed, Rosalie gave it a going over as far as mechanics, and I had the tires replaced as a precaution."

"Edward, I-I don't know what to say."

He embraced me again, lowering his lips to my ear. "So you'll always have something to remember me by."

Well, personally the sex was good enough for me, but the man was giving me an incredibly expensive and luxurious car, I wasn't about to quibble over details.

Charlie was surprise by the gift as well, though quite thankful too, he was worried my truck wouldn't make it all the way to Florida.

Before Edward left, he gave me a final kiss good bye. Promised me he would e-mail me, and as I watched the man I love get into his sister's car and drive away I wasn't able to hold back the tears that inevitable came.

Five years had passed since I said a final good bye to my Edward. Five years since I moved to Florida and began my college education. Five years since I realized that I shouldn't have let him go as easily as I had. He had kept his word and e-mailed me almost every day, and called me at least once a month. He never visited, though I never expected he would. Alice did, once, my sophomore year, to tell me in person that she and Jasper eloped, but never after that.

I had always known there was something different about the Cullen's, I had my theories of course, but I never really wanted to…explore them. I was happy with my delusion that Edward was a normal average teenage boy, but that was then, and this was now.

I had moved on, and dated other guys, the last of which lead me to my current state, laying in my hospital bed, barely conscious, and in more pain than I ever thought possible. He had just gotten a new motorcycle and wanted to take me for a spin.

I wish my Edward was here. Not my mom or Charlie but my Edward. I wish I could take his cold hand in mine, I wish he could whisper into my ear that everything was going to be okay, I wish he could take me away from all of this, back into his arms, into our Meadow, where life was so simple so wonderful. Just me and my Edward.

My body, unwilling to suffer any longer began to shut down, I could see the doctor shaking his head, his hands covered in my blood. As my eyes slowly began to drift closed, I saw him, his copper hair and golden eyes looked down at me and smiled softly. I heard his soothing voice tell me he would make the pain go away, it was at that point I knew that I was going to die, and my Edward would be in my afterlife, because heaven simply wouldn't be good enough without him.

And suddenly everything went dark.

My eyes opened with a flash. Everything was so clear and bight, almost blindingly bright, yet I could see everything so perfectly. I took in a long deep breath allowing the air to fill my lungs, but for some reason it felt different, good but different, and then, suddenly I realized someone was holding my hand. He smiled, his beautiful eyes glowing down at me with love.

"Edward." I wasted no time in wrapping both my arms around him and pulling him to a long desired hug. "I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you too, Bella."

"I love you so much." It was the first time I had said the words to him since the day I last saw him.

He kissed my head softly, and then my nose, and finally my lips. "I love you too, Bella for all eternity."

**The End**

**This has been modified from its orginal version. Hop you enjoy the changes.**

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